Giving in to my Bisexual Desires


I’m thirty-five years old and I am bored with life. Work is fine. I have a good group of friends. I’ve dated a lot of attractive women and had a lot of good sex (as well as some really bad stuff too). But I still felt like my life was missing something. It was missing excitement. I needed to get out of my own comfort zone, but I didn’t even know where to begin. Today was a random Saturday in September. It was now around 2:00 p.m. I had plans to go hang out at my friend Nick’s house later in the day. Maybe a few beers and an open night would lead to some excitement.

As far back as I can remember, I have always been – how to put this – not 100% straight. I’ve never “come out” to any family or friends or anything like that. And I never intended to. But, I’ve always been attracted to both girls and some boys but in different ways. In school, I was like most of the other kids in class flirting with the girls and being just friends with guys. But whenever I had the opportunity, probably even before I even realized it myself, I liked checking out other guys in gym class or in the locker rooms of whatever sports I was playing at that point in my life. I was always fascinated by penises. I loved seeing them hanging between my classmates’ legs. They came in all sorts of shapes and sizes and every one is unique.

When I was a freshman in college, we had communal showers in the dorms. We always joked about how lame it was and how we all were adults and should be allowed some actual privacy. But secretly, I loved it. I looked forward each day to jumping under the shower and seeing who was in there already or who would come into shower while I was in there. It made it basically impossible to jerk off in the shower but it sure did provide me with some mental images for later in the day when I was alone.

I vividly remember the times when Mark Williams took a shower at the same time as me. He was my age but by freshman year he was already built like a strong 25 year old athlete. I was enamored by him. To this day, I consider him to be my first male-crush. I jerked off thinking about him many, many times that school year (in fact I still do on occasion). He was around six-foot-two-inches with a broad chest and thick thighs. He had a great head of dark brown hair that looked even sexier when it was wet. His cock was a perfect match for his athletic body.

Unfortunately, I never saw Mark’s cock fully erect but there were times that it looked semi-erect in the shower. His pubic hair was trimmed and his balls were completely shaved and smooth. His cock was smooth with a nice thick vein running its length. Everytime I saw it in the shower I felt my own cock twitch with desire. Had I had any doubt about my own sexuality at that time, it would have been erased when I set my eyes on that near perfect young, well endowed man.

I’m a bit of a serial long term dater of women – and I am also loyal. This means I have been able to have regular sex the past 20 years or so with lots of women but never left myself any real openings for true experimentation. I guess what I’m trying to say is I have never been with a guy because I’m almost always dating a female. Which, don’t get me wrong, is not necessarily a terrible thing. I love fucking women. I love everything there is to love about women. But there is one thing they have never been able to fulfill for me and that is having a nice big hard cock for me to play with. I am also a lot of talk and no action – I think about cock a lot but I’ve never really tried to get it. In all honestly, it made me uneasy to even think about doing something about these desires in my real life.

I spent the morning and most of the afternoon cleaning up my apartment and cleaning up myself in the shower as well. It was now 6:00 p.m. and Nick and I had been texting to solidify our plans to hang out at his place then decide what to do from there. I was dressed and ready to roll out. I locked the door to my apartment and walked the three blocks or so to the closest bus stop that would get me close to Nick’s apartment, which was due east from me but around three miles away. He lived in more of a younger neighborhood than me with more bars and clubs. I always enjoyed visiting but glad I lived somewhere that was a bit quieter and more low key.

The bus pulled up around five minutes after I got to the stop. I climbed the three stairs to get on, scanned my pass, and walked toward the back of the bus and found myself an open seat next to a window. The bus was only half filled with riders when I got on but continued to get more crowded as we cruised east toward Nick’s place. Around half way to my destination, I saw a guy around my own age get on. He was gay – at least I felt he was gay. Maybe bisexual at minimum. He just had that look, which I had become pretty good at figuring out after having lived in the city for the past ten years or so. My gaydar, so to speak, was fairly accurate. I watched him scan his pass to get on the bus. He walked slowly down the aisle and I noticed he saw the empty seat next to me. I hoped to myself that he would choose to take advantage of it and sit next to me.

As he got close istanbul travesti to me, he looked down at me and asked, “Mind if I sit here?”

My mind raced. I fantasized about him sitting next to me. We could start chatting and discover how much we have in common. Perhaps he senses my attraction to him and invites me out or back to his place or wherever it is he’s going to now. This could be the man I finally give into my desires with.

“Excuse me…” he said it a little louder. “Do mind if I sit here?”

Crap – I thought to myself. I just ignored this man…”Oh sure. Sorry. Please have a seat.”

“Thanks,” he replied.

He sat down next to me. Our shoulders pressed up against each other. I wondered if he felt it as well. His cologne was subtle but intoxicating. My mind raced with pure fantasy. By now he had pulled out his phone and was looking at god knows what. But he was probably just pretending. I knew he was thinking about me just like I was thinking about him. I cautiously looked down at his lap and I swear I saw a bulge pushing against the zipper of his pants. Deep in my mind I could see his cock growing bigger and harder. I saw a glisten of precum leaking out of the tip of his cock. His six pack abs rippled as my tongue inched its way down his body. He moaned softly at my touch. His intoxicating aroma found its way into my nostrils. I breathed in deeply enjoying his unique scent.

“Hey,” he spoke. He said hey to me. This is my opportunity.

“Hey,” I replied back and smiled.

“Can you pull the bell for me? My stop is next and I didn’t want to just reach over you.”

“Oh sure. Of course,” I replied. And I pulled the cord. The bell rang signifying to the driver that someone wanted to get off the bus at the next stop.

Christian then stood up as the bus came to a stop. I decided his name was Christian. It sounded sexy to me. I watched Christian stand up and leave. I’d never see him again most likely. I closed my eyes to seal a mental image of his chiseled jawline and wide shoulders into my head. Next time I needed some inspiration, I could use that image and imagine it’s his cock shooting a load all over me – even if in reality it was once again just my own cum landing on my body during another lonely jerk session.

My stop was three stops away. I texted Nick to let him know I was getting close. My cock, which I just noticed had gotten very hard behind the confines of my jeans, was starting to soften again now that Christian had left my life. Two minutes later, I pulled the stop cord again – this time for myself – and exited the bus. Nick’s apartment was only about a block from the stop so I was there in no time. I let myself into his building and took the stairs up to his third floor apartment. I knocked on the door for apartment number 3C. Seconds later, the door popped open and Nick was there to greet me.

“What’s up man?” Nick smiled at me as he opened the door. He was also a perfect host handing me an ice cold can of beer before I even stepped all the way inside.

“Solid. Thank you sir,” I replied as I popped the top on the cold metal can and took my first sip of the bitter ale.

“I just picked these up. They’re from that new brewery that just opened down the street. Careful though – this thing is strong!” Nick said.

“Good tip,” I answered back. And it was a good tip. I examined the can I was drinking from and saw it was a 9% alcohol by volume double IPA. That’ll get the party going, I thought to myself.

“Come in, come in. Have a seat,” Nick directed me to the couch in his living room. The TV was on and a baseball game was in progress. I did as I was asked and grabbed a seat on the couch, grabbed a coaster, and put my beer down for the moment. Nick walked into his kitchen and appeared to be up to no good.

“Whatcha doing in there?” I asked.

“It’s a surprise,” Nick answered.

“Bro – I can literally see you. You’re pouring us shots. What are we having?”

“Cinnamon whiskey. What else would we have?” Nick said. He finished pouring our shots and came back into the living room and sat down on the couch with me. “Cheers.”

“Cheers,” I replied back. We both shot our drinks down quickly. No chasers necessary as this stuff was actually pretty damn smooth as far as spicy cinnamon whiskey goes.

I grabbed my double IPA and took another long drink. I saw Nick doing the same thing plus there was what appeared to be an empty can sitting on the kitchen counter.

“You down one beer already?” I asked.

“Yes sir. I got bored waiting for you,” Nick laughed.

“I’d suggest I need to catch up but you’ve always had a higher tolerance than me,” I said.

“That’s true. You’ve always been a lightweight,” Nick laughed.

“Maybe but all that means is I can get messed up for a lot less money than it takes you!” I replied back.

“Fair point,” Nick remarked. “So what should we do tonight? As much as hanging out here with you would be cool, I think it might be a good day to go out to some of the bars. I’m in the mood to find us some bar hotties.”

I silently agreed with Nick’s suggestion. But istanbul travestileri I was still a bit stuck on my run in with Christian on my way here. But I kept that to myself. That was private. I simply replied, “Sounds like a plan.”

We finished our double IPAs and decided to have one more before we headed out. Nick, always the gracious host, came back with two beers and poured two more shots and handed one of each to me.

“Dude – I am going to be wasted before we even leave your apartment,” I half joked.

“Well, drink it slow. Let’s watch something to inspire us tonight,” Nick was talking to me but was staring down at his smart phone. “Here we go…”

Nick had apparently pulled up some porn on his phone and had set it to play on the big flat screen television that moments ago had simply had a baseball game on. Suddenly, the screen changed and revealed a small breasted petite woman getting fucked hard from behind while simultaneously sucking on another guy’s quite enormous penis.

“This okay?” Nick asked.

“Looks good to me,” I replied. My attention was suddenly focused on the TV screen. The woman was quite stunning. She was thin and in shape. Her small breasts were peaked by perfectly sized maroon nipples. Her ass was round and solid but still had enough bounce that it rippled each time the man fucking her from behind slammed back inside of her. By this point in the movie, she wasn’t really focusing on sucking the other guy’s cock but he was pretty focused on using her mouth for his own pleasure.

“You ever done anything like that,” Nick asked.

“You mean a threesome? No. Never. How about you?” I replied.

“Nah. Closest ever was some girl in college gave my buddy head while I watched and jerked off. Seems kinda sad saying that out loud but at the time it was pretty cool,” Nick said.

“I mean – that does sound pretty cool to be honest. Did she get him off while you watched?” I asked.

“Yeah. Sort of. I remember she stopped right when he was about to cum and he ended up cumming on her tits. I shot my load right after that too and it became immediately awkward,” Nick laughed. “I remember having to be some sort of gentleman to let her into the bathroom first to clean up. So there I was covered in my own cum with my friend standing there naked as this girl closed the bathroom door behind us.”

“Oh man! That’s hilarious but also at the same time freaking awesome,” I nearly shot beer out of my nose I laughed so hard.

“Yep. I don’t regret it either. You only live once I suppose,” Nick trailed off as he remembered his glory days.

I slugged back the last of my second beer. “Let’s roll out.”

“Good idea,” Nick replied.

“Where are we headed?” I asked.

“I’m pretty good and buzzed after those couple shots and three beers. Sooo….not too far,” Nick laughed.

“Agreed,” I replied. “So where would that be?”

“About two blocks away is ‘Bounce.’ Dumb name but cool place. They should have a DJ and some good music. And that usually means lots of ladies,” Nick smirked.

“I’m down.”


Two hours later, we were at still at Bounce. And I was very, very drunk. So was Nick. But Nick, it seemed, was having a much better time than me. I watched him dancing with a group of women who were clearly enjoying his company. They weren’t my type so I stayed at our table sipping my unnecessary but still quite tasty cocktail. They weren’t Nick’s type either, but by this point, he didn’t care. I think he was happy to finally be getting some attention from some females. They had tried to get me to come out there and dance with the group but I had zero interest in doing so. I never did. I wasn’t the dancing type. To each their own. My cocktail was nearly empty and the bartender noticed.

“Would you like another drink? A water perhaps?” the bartender (Jake was his name as I had learned around four or five drinks ago) asked.

“Water. Good idea. I’ll have a water, thanks.”

“No problem,” Jake responded with a smile as he set down the cold iced water in front of me. As I took my first sip, Nick came back. But he wasn’t alone. One of his dancing partners, Jessica I believe was the name she gave me earlier, was with him.

“Hey man,” Nick started, “Jenny and me… (“Fuck – Jenny not Jessica,” I thought to myself) are going to head back to my place for a little fun. You ready to head out too?”

I smiled best as I could in my drunken haze, “Yeah, I’m ready to get out of here too.”

“Cool. I’ll pay our tab and we can square up later,” Nick replied.

He walked to the other side of the bar to get the bartender’s attention. That left Jessica or Jenny or whoever alone to kill some time awkwardly. We both knew what was happening and I knew I was a third wheel about to be in the way.

“Nick’s cool, huh?” Jessica or Jenny slurred. “You guys are like friends?”

“Yes, we’re friends. And I agree. He’s cool,” I replied doing my best to end the conversation then and there. But, Jennyica didn’t get the hint.

“He’s really cute,” she continued.

“Uhhh. Okay yeah,” now I slurred a travesti istanbul bit. Damnit Nick hurry up and get back here.

“I think we’re gonna fuck when we get back to his place,” Jessica or Jenny slurred some more. “Is that like cool?”

“Yeah of course. Have a good time,” I said.

“You can watch if you want,” she surprised me with that one.

“I’m sorry what’s your name again? If I’m gonna watch – and I might take you up on that offer – I should know your name,” I rolled with the sharp turn this conversation had taken.


“Jenny, right.” I really thought she was Jessica.

Just then Nick came back. “So, you two ready to head out?” Nick asked.

“Yep. And Jenny wants me to watch, which I’ve already agreed to so hope that’s cool.”

“Hah! Uh okay. That’s different but what the hell,” Nick drunkenly agreed to the new plans.


The walk back to Nick’s took about three times as long as it normally should. Jenny stopped to puke once. Nick stopped twice. I, shockingly enough, was the only one who made it back to Nick’s with a full stomach.

Nick pulled out his keys and somehow managed to stick the correct key into the lock to let the three of us in.

“Wow,” Jenny slurred. “Your place is super nice. Do you mind if I use the restroom?”

“Of course not,” Nick replied. He showed her to the facilities and came back out to the living room where I had made myself comfortable on the couch.

“Sooo…you cool with this? You know – you really want to watch?” Nick asked. Again.

“I guess. I mean, I got nothing else to do. If I get bored, I’ll come back here and watch T.V. or something. I mean, it’s like 1:00 a.m. so I might just go to sleep.

Nick sat down on the opposite end of the couch. We waited in silence for a few minutes. Five minutes. Ten minutes…still no Jessica. Wait, Jenny.

“Maybe check on her?” I suggested.

“Yeah,” Nick mumbled and walked to the bathroom.

I heard him knocking and calling her name through the door. “Jenny! Hey you okay? I’m coming in!”

I heard the door creak open. “Crap!” Nick said under his breath but loud enough for me to hear. “She’s passed the fuck out! Can you give me a hand?”

I got up and assisted in what needed to be done. We managed to wake Jenny up but she was not feeling very well. Shocker. To make a long story short, we managed to get her to drink down some water and got her into the bed in the guest room. She was awake again for the moment and apologized nonstop. We assured her it was no big deal. We’d assured her that we would take care of her. And we did. We stayed in there with her until she fell asleep.

“Damnit man. That was about to be a memorable night,” Nick turned to me as we both sat again on the couch. He was on my left – and me on his right. There was only about two feet of empty couch cushion separating us. It was now after 2:00 a.m. and Jenny seemed to be doing better now. She was sound asleep and apparently comfortable.

“Totally. I was sort of looking forward to it once I got over the initial weirdness of it,” I replied.

“Same,” Nick agreed.

“Well,” Nick started to talk as he stood up. “I’m getting a beer. Want one?”

Against my better judgment, I accepted another drink. By now, I had sobered up a bit. So had Nick I guess. It had been around three hours since my last drink and I’d been pounding more water since we got back to Nick’s place.

Nick returned with a lager for each of us from the kitchen fridge. “So, porn?” Nick asked me matter of factly.

I laughed, “Well, I guess if I was going to watch the two of you I might as well watch some professionals go at it.”

Nick turned on the television, grabbed his phone and pulled up another porn web site. “Anything in particular?” my kind host asked me.

“Whatever. Maybe a red head if you can find it.”

“I think I can manage that,” Nick replied. And before I knew it, a very hot, very naked, and very horny red head was on the screen sucking a very large and very hard cock.

“That could’ve been me, man,” Nick sighed.

“Yeah, dude, sorry,” I comforted my friend during this tough time.

“Well – hope you don’t mind but I didn’t turn this on just to watch it,” Nick smirked as he unbuttoned his pants and pulled them all the way off.

“Hell – why not,” I replied as I did the same. Almost in unison, we also both pulled off our shirts and socks. I glanced over at Nick and his hand was down the front of his boxers slowly but surely rubbing his, what I assumed was now, hard cock. I took his cue and did the same.

“You ever done this before?” Nick asked. “I mean jerk off with another guy in the room.”

“Um, I have. In college a few times,” I answered honestly.

We both sat there…mostly silent for the first few minutes. I slowly rubbed my cock under my boxers while my eyes stayed glued to the television screen. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Nick moving. He pulled off his boxers to fully free his cock. I realized in all the years I’d know Nick, this was the first time I’d ever seen his cock. It was…magnificent. I grew harder just from looking at it. I decided now was a good time to take off my underwear as well. I did so and tossed them aside. I wrapped my right hand around my fully erect cock. And rather than look back at the T.V., my eyes again looked down at Nick’s hand stroking his cock slowly up and down.

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