Barbara’s Binoculars


A bit about the house I grew up in. It was one among many rows of identical boxes built after the war; an anonymous place with no obvious character, in an estate on the outskirts of a town in sharp industrial decline.

My favourite room was the attic!

I’d climb up there and pull the ladder up behind me, guaranteeing I wouldn’t be disturbed. Mother liked to hoard stuff, and over the years she’d stored dozens of boxes of her old clothes, out of which I sorted several serviceable skirts, dresses and blouses, along with lots of lingerie…

My favourite box was full of bras, panties, stockings and tights!

I’d get home from college a couple of hours before mother finished work, and I’d go straight to the attic. There was an old wardrobe with a full length mirror, and I’d slowly dress myself while watching every move as I put on a bra and panties, then tights or stockings, and finally a dress or maybe a skirt and blouse.

Then I’d put some music on and chill out, feeling happy and wholesome!

Sometimes I’d try on several different outfits. I’d spend time posing in front of the mirror, maybe wondering what would happen if I ventured into town dressed like this, or simply dreaming of the day I could leave home and live as a woman.

I found a blonde wig and helped myself to lipstick and mascara off mother’s untidy dresser. The only thing I lacked was a decent pair of shoes; although my feet are small, by this time they were much bigger than hers, so I had to make do with my black gym pumps.

Apart from that, I was very pleased with my wardrobe up in the attic!

One afternoon I was busy admiring myself in the mirror when the doorbell rang. Naturally, I ignored it and carried on posing in the short, sequined dress I’d just found. But this caller was unusually persistent; the bell rang for so long it was still ringing in my ears when I finally descended, long after the caller had given up.

Beneath the door, I found a note. At first I assumed it must be for mother so I put it with her other mail, but then I noticed it was addressed to me! This was strange, as I had very few friends.

Opening it, I read the following…

Dear Sissy,

You should be more careful, I can see everything you do in your attic from my bedroom window! Now I know all about you I’ll tell everyone at college unless you do exactly what I say! Meet me at the old manor house tomorrow at 4.30pm.


PS. If you don’t show up, I will ruin your life!

My heart jumped in my chest! Barbara was the girl next door. Two years older than me, she was in her final year at college, whereas I was in my first. Her brother Frank had been the worst of my bullies at high school, though fortunately he’d not gone on to college, so I hardly ever saw him…

But if Frank discovered my secret, life wouldn’t be worth living!

The old manor house was a crumbling building standing in a quiet lane, just behind our estate. It had been earmarked for demolition and was under a stay of execution while a dispute between the owners and the local council got sorted out. It was fenced off and surrounded with No Entry signs, but kids sneaked in whenever they liked.

Even though I’d never been inside before, I knew where the hole in the fence was, and at 4.30pm the next day I nervously clambered through it.

Although it was a dull, overcast day, I was surprised how bright it was inside. This was because parts of the roof were missing! Birds could be heard squawking in the rafters and there were patches on the floorboards covered in bird droppings, along with used condoms and syringes…

It was definitely not the kind of place I wanted to hang around!

“Is that you, sissy?”


“Come up here!”

I was surprised to hear she was upstairs. The staircase looked thoroughly rotten; the bannister was worm-eaten, while several of the treads were either broken or missing. Creeping carefully up it, the whole edifice shook horribly and I was relieved to reach the top in one piece!

There I found Barbara. In the lottery of looks, she hadn’t done too badly; hers was a pretty face, with full, pouting lips and vivid, piercing green eyes. She wore her long blonde hair pinned back into a ponytail, which made her look needlessly severe. But for that, she could have been a model – from the neck up.

But lower down, the genes that made her brother Frank such an effective bully had left their mark. She was reasonably curvy but far too muscular. She had all the biceps and triceps necessary to throw a punch and a footballer’s legs which her pretty, patterned tights and patent leather ankle boots could hardly even begin to disguise.

She was one of the tallest girls in college, and in her heels she towered over me by a couple of inches.

“I suppose,” she said smugly, “you’re wondering how I found you out?”

“Y-yes!” I replied. It was perfectly true, I really was baffled! The attic window was by far the smallest in our house; just a tiny square that anyway didn’t face her house. There was a skylight, but that was high çanakkale escort in the roof. Surely she couldn’t see through that?

“Our loft’s been converted recently,” she explained airily. “It’s now my bedroom, and if I look at your skylight with my granddad’s old binoculars, I can see the top of your mirror, which you’ve angled downwards so as to better admire yourself. Dumb mistake, sissy! It lets me see everything you do!”

So that was it! “Okay,” I said with a nervous shrug. “So what do you want from me?”

“My silence won’t come cheap,” she declared, smiling malevolently, “but you’ll be wise to pay my price! Otherwise, I’ll tell everyone at college about you, plus of course there’s my brother…”

“N-no, please!”

Frank terrified me. Fast with his fists, he took his time when torturing his hapless victims, of which I’d been only one of many. On our last encounter, he’d forced my head down a dirty toilet. I’d heard he was working in a factory and not enjoying it, which had made him meaner than ever!

“Well if you don’t want me to involve Frank then you’d better do what I tell you!”

“And w-what is that?” I stammered.

“Come in here!” So saying, she led me into a large room that had probably once been a ballroom. Remnants of ornate alabaster coving still clung to parts of the ceiling, gilded with intricate, fading finials. But like the rest of the old manor house, the floorboards were riddled with wormholes. The sole surviving piece of furniture was a rotting table, covered in dust and littered with discarded drugs paraphernalia.

“Take your clothes off!” Barbara commanded.

“W-where? In here!”

“Of course in here! You can put them on that table!”

I thought she might give me a moment’s privacy, but she simply stood, leaning against the rickety door with a hand on her hip, and stared luridly as I most reluctantly undressed.

“God, what a sissy you are! My boyfriend’s got twice as much meat as you, and as for Frank! No wonder you want to be a girl; you’re halfway there already!”

Reddening, I instinctively cupped my hands around my petite phallus and stood before her thoroughly cowed and embarrassed.

“Here, put these on!”

From her shoulder bag, she produced a skimpy red bra and matching panties. As she handed them to me, I noticed the panties were stinking and sodden. “I can’t!” I protested, “They’re filthy!”

“Suit yourself, I’ll go home and make a few phone calls about you…”

“Okay, okay!”

Gingerly, I put on the dirty panties and the matching bra, which also stank.

“That’s better! Now, get down on your knees!”

Shivering with trepidation I knelt before Barbara, whose face I noticed had become a picture of evil pleasure.

“Don’t sit up like that! I want to see you grovel!”

I crouched down until my face was almost touching the floorboards. I was alarmed to see how rotten they were; the wood was dry and crumbling and smelt of fungus. Then the smell of polished leather intervened, and all I could see before me was the toe and throat of Barbara’s stylish boot.

“Get licking, sissy!”

I didn’t like this, not one bit. I felt degraded and humiliated, but then I figured it could be a lot worse! I mean, having to lick a boot is surely better than having your head stuck down a filthy toilet that hasn’t been flushed all day? Maybe the sister would prove more humane than the brother? I could live in hope…

Though such hopes would soon be cruelly dashed!

Though passably clean, on close inspection Barbara’s boot was covered by a crusty layer of dirt from the streets, which soon collected in the back of my throat, forcing me to gag and retch.

“What’s wrong, sissy? Don’t like the taste?”


“Then you should have been more careful!”

So saying, Barbara gave me the other boot to lick.

When I’d finally finished licking both boots, she said I could go home, though she was far from finished with me. The next day, I was to wear the soiled red bra and panties under my regular clothes to college, then meet her afterwards in the same place.

“And don’t you dare wash them!” she admonished, staring at me in a weird and scary way before finally letting me go.

I spent most of that night tossing and turning and tearfully trying to figure a way out of my terrible situation. When I finally slept, I dreamt of packing a suitcase and running off to London, dressed as a woman. But my dream turned into a nightmare when Frank found me at the station and pushed me under an approaching train…

Was there no escape from these awful siblings, even in my dreams?!

The next morning, I put the red bra and panties on underneath my regular clothes and went to college. The day passed weirdly; every casual glance or smile from another student caused me to think they could either see or smell what I was wearing underneath, and that made me blush! Twice I met Barbara in the corridors, and both times she whispered something to friends which made them laugh and sneer at me.

When the final lesson çeşme escort ended, I was glad to get out of college, but nervous about what the rest of the day held in store. Clambering through the wire into the old manor house, I was surprised to hear several girls’ voices. On climbing the stairs, I found Barbara in the company of two friends.

“Here’s sissy now!” she exclaimed, interrupting her conversation. “Well, don’t just stand there! Get your clothes off!”

Her friends were called Kim and Tracy and were the classmates who’d sneered at me earlier in the day. Feeling hopelessly timid, I went into the same room as before and began slowly taking my clothes off. When they saw the red bra and panties I was wearing, Kim and Tracy had giggling fits and I could see from the way they looked at me I’d become an object of scorn and ridicule.

“Here Barb, ain’t they the knickers you were wearing when you pissed yourself the other night?” Kim asked, and when Barbara said they were, all three fell about laughing!

Tracy took a bottle of cider from her bag, and the girls began drinking. I suspect it wasn’t their first drink of the day, because they quickly became animated in ways that could only serve to increase my already sky-high anxiety levels.

Standing before them in nothing but Barbara’s dirty bra and panties, I began to shiver from cold as much as fear. It was halfway through the autumn term, and as the nights were drawing in, so the temperature was dropping. Goose pimples soon covered my mostly naked flesh, while my teeth began to chatter.

“Time for sissy to put some clothes on!” Barbara announced, pulling a frilly pink dress from her bulging bag. “This was bought for me by an auntie who thinks I’m still twelve! It should suit sissy just fine!”

Before handing me the gaudy dress, Barbara made me pad my bra out with my socks. I’d had a long, hard day at college, so they were far from fragrant. Using them to pad out the already rank bra gave me an awful, fetid odour which, mixed with the smell from my piss-soaked panties, left me smelling like a donkey!

Barbara was right about the dress; it was designed for an overgrown moppet. A monstrosity of pink polyester with white cotton frills, no normal girl would want to be seen dead in it. A matching bonnet completed an outfit that nobody could have felt comfortable wearing, except possibly Little Bo Peep’s oversized older sister!

“Put these on as well,” Barbara commanded, handing me a pair of pink tights. “And what size shoes do you wear?”


“Try these. They’re fives, but you’ll just have to make do!”

So saying, she handed me a pair of pink, high-heeled court shoes. They were well-worn and rather scuffed. I squeezed into them with some difficulty, but found I couldn’t walk. Simply standing up, my toes felt hopelessly crushed and I couldn’t imagine taking a single step in them…

Though I had another think coming!

“Doesn’t sissy look nice?”

“Sure does!”

“Kim, you do sissy’s face, then we’ll all go down to the mall!”

“To the m-mall!” I exclaimed, gasping for breath. “But I can’t walk!”

“Well you’d better start practising then!” Barbara retorted unsympathetically. “I said you’d have to make do in those shoes and so you will, unless you’d rather have a friendly chat with my Frank?”

Flushing bright crimson, I chose not to reply while Kim painted my lips with garish pink lipstick before applying eye-liner and mascara.

“Ready girls?”


They quickly finished their cider, then with no consideration whatsoever for my feelings, led me out of the old manor house and down the road towards the mall. The walk was about a mile, and almost immediately my feet began to swell and throb. Every step felt like a hammer blow to my toes and tears dripped down my cheeks as I tottered along, expecting to faint at any moment!

And yet, my feet were far from my first concern…

What would happen when we got to the mall?

I didn’t have long to find out! The girls led me through the main entrance towards the plaza, where there was a seating area popular with students. Seeing several of my classmates hanging around made me blush and I really didn’t want to go there, but my feet were killing me and anyway, Barbara wouldn’t have given me any choice in the matter.

Before or since, I’ve never felt so self-conscious! Sitting among a group of trendily dressed students wearing that frilly pink monstrosity, I couldn’t have looked any more weird! They stared at me long and hard, smirking and sniggering…

And yet, no one seemed to recognize me!

“Hey, Barbs! Who’s your funny friend?”

The question came from John, one of the cool kids who drove motorbikes and wore shades all year round. He saw me several times a day in my normal clothes and never gave me so much as a second glance; he probably didn’t even know my name, but now he was eyeing me up! I shifted uneasily in my seat, aware that Barbara and the other girls were weighing their options. What fun it would be to expose me diyarbakır escort here and now, in front of this raucous crowd! How high they would soar in the eyes of their peers, on the back of my humiliation!

But despite being fairly drunk and no doubt sorely tempted, Barbara held her fire.

“This is Sissy,” she announced, idly turning a derogatory epithet into a given name. “She’s from out of town.”

“I can see that!” John exclaimed.

“Has she lost her sheep?” cracked some wise guy.

“Not if my nose is anything to go by!” another chipped in.

I blushed, and yet I was secretly pleased! No one had recognized me or guessed my true gender! We sat around with that group for nearly half an hour, during which I was the butt of many jokes, but nobody questioned my identity.

After a little while, Barbara said we needed to get going and we all went upstairs, where the interesting shops were. There was a record store, a couple of popular boutiques and an off-licence, all side by side.

“We’ll go in here first,” Barbara whispered, pointing to a boutique with racks of stylish yet prohibitively expensive skirts and blouses. She handed me her shoulder bag and with Kim and Tracy scowling at me added, “Just don’t muck this up, sissy!”

Following them into the boutique I felt a bag of nerves, unsure as I was what trouble they might be about to drop me into! Standing next to Barbara, my aching feet came back to haunt me and I once more felt like crying. To take my mind off my tender toes, I tried perusing a rack of pretty blouses, but soon something quite unexpected grabbed my attention.

I saw Kim, who was checking out the rack next to me, swipe a blouse and stuff it in her bag! Looking elsewhere, I saw Tracy do the same thing with a pricey leather skirt. Only then did I belatedly pay attention to Barbara’s antics and realize she was furiously filling a bulging bag with beautiful blouses!

My sense of shame and danger must have been written all over my face, because when Barbara glanced in my direction, she looked seriously nervous.

“Remember sissy, if you blow this your life is over!” That’s what she hissed under her breath before ordering me to follow her out of the shop. “Stay close behind us,” she added, “and whatever happens, make sure you don’t get in front! Understand?”

I said I did and followed the three girls out of the store. All of their bags were heavily laden with stolen clothes and I shuddered to think what would happen to me when we were caught, as I was sure we would be!

Of course, the clothes had security tags on them and as soon as we passed through the door, sensors set the alarms off, filling the mall with an ominous echo.

“Run!” shouted Barbara and we all ran for it, the girls ably sprinting away with their cram-packed bags while I tottered hopelessly in my painful pink court shoes, my toes feeling like they were treading on nails!

“Where do you think you’re going, you thieving bitch?”

The voice belonged to a burly mall security guard, who bundled me back inside the boutique. Visions of a police cell began to terrify me, and I fretted what would happen when my true identity was discovered; but I needn’t have worried…

Within ten minutes, they let me go!

Walking back to the old manor house, I realised Barbara had far more brains than her brother Frank, even if she shared his lousy morals. Despite their better instincts, the mall guards couldn’t hold me because I didn’t have any stolen goods! The banal contents of Barbara’s shoulder bag could easily be accounted for, because I’d been nothing but a decoy!

I found Barbara, Kim and Tracy drinking more cider. “You took your time!” Barbara scolded, looking really annoyed with me. “You’d better be faster next time!”

I was learning that silence was the best weapon against her irrational strops, so I said nothing, but simply fetched my regular clothes and changed.

“Be early tomorrow,” she told me before I went home, “we’ve a special present for you!”

That night, I had the longest, hottest bath of my life. I kept my toes under warm, soapy water till they finally felt halfway normal! And in spite of Barbara’s baleful threats, I washed her filthy red bra and panties!

In the comfort of my own home, I could contemplate rebellion; but the next day I made sure I was back at the old manor house nice and early, just like I’d been told!

By now I understood the routine, and didn’t need to be asked to strip down to my skimpy red bra and panties. A wry glance between the girls suggested they’d noticed I’d washed them, but for the moment nothing was said. With a mildly menacing smile that I was fast learning was the nearest thing Barbara possessed to a pleasant countenance, she handed me a monochrome polka dot mini dress.

It felt clean and fresh, in fact brand new. It was only when I found the security tag that I realised it was one of those garments the girls had stolen from the boutique the previous day!

“Put these on!” she commanded, handing me the dress along with a pair of black tights. I was also given a stylish black cloche hat to wear, no doubt also stolen. Like the pink bonnet it completely covered my hair, only without making me look weird! Once again Kim did my make-up, this time using a much darker lipstick and putting on plenty more eye-liner.